Halloween Costume Party

We went to a kids' costume party this weekend at the house of our friends Hilary and Jonathan.

There were lots of kids in costumes, and of course, Paprika wore her favorite dress- her Snow White dress.

Paprika's going through a thing now where she gets really pensive and likes being alone sometimes. She'll say, "Mommy, go in the other room please." Of course, I go in the other room and then watch her like a hawk through the door crack. It's just her asserting her independence, I guess.

So, I wasn't surprised at the party when I spotted Paprika far away from the other guests, lost in thought:



She returned to the party soon afterwards, ready to play!

Pumpkin Festival and The Chicken

Saturday we went to the Pumpkin Festival. We went last year, and wow, it's amazing how much Paprika has changed in just one year. Here's us at the festival last year: Pumpkin Fest 2007 Look how much more hair she has this year compared to last year!



Paprika's favorite part of the festival was the animals. She loved petting the pony, sheep, goats, and the pig.





But her very favorite animal of all was the rooster, aka "Chicken." Paprika talked to the chicken for at least 45 minutes. I think they may have had some kind of a soul connection. She was so gentle with him, and would pet him so softly. She would whisper into his ear, "What are you thinking about, Chicken?" "What do you dream about, Chicken?"









When the other kids would come up to pet him, she would tell them to be nice, and if they tried to put food into his water dish (a big no-no), she would take it out for him so that his water was clean.

She never wanted to leave his side. It was very hard getting her to leave. When she got home, she cried, "Where's Chicken! I want to go see Chicken!" So, at least we have pictures of their day together. Paprika and The Chicken! :-)

All Alone

One thing I can say is that Paprika gets a lot of individualized attention. She has me 24-7, and overall is a really happy, well-adjusted child.

At the same time, I look at her and am so sad that she is growing up without any siblings around her. We were supposed to be a full house, right about now, with three kids under the age of three.

I think about how much she would have loved playing with her sisters, and as they grew how much fun they would have had getting into trouble.

It is so much fun getting to focus all my attention on Paprika, don't get me wrong. It's just that sometimes it is a lot of pressure, and I have to pull myself together (can't wallow in grief) when someone so important is relying on me as her everything.

I know she gets exposed to other kids from the playdates we have, and the child-centered places we go. But it's not the same as having your own siblings.

I've been thinking a lot about my decision to give up my career to stay home with Paprika, whether that was the right thing to do. We re-evaluate all the time, of course, and I imagine what it would be like to pursue a high-powered career, make loads of money, and all that. I guess it would give me significance outside my home- because right now, my everything is my family. But, when 2/3 of your children aren't with you, it's difficult to find that wholeness in the home. Still, I think it was the right decision for our family for me to stay home.

I guess what I'm saying is that I really miss Vivian and Annemarie- not just for me, but also because I had so many dreams of what they would mean to Paprika. Not having them here makes our house seem so empty. I keep thinking, "they should be here now." But they're not, and it's something I have to wake up to every single day.

Day At The Children's Museum

Paprika and I spent today at the Children's Museum. She had a GREAT time painting. And the best part was that I didn't have to clean up afterwards! Paprika is quite the artist. She loves to draw and paint for hours.



After she was done painting, Paprika decided it was time to ride bikes outside.



Then, it was time to uncover dinosaur bones like a real archaelogist.



Then, it was back to more painting in a different part of the museum.



After she got that out of her system, we went to the toddler area and Paprika had fun sliding down the slide!

Lazy Sunday

We had our lazy Sunday at the Huntington today. Paprika had a great time looking at the fish, throwing rocks in the river, and running through the gardens. Here are some pictures from our day!