What Is Worth Saving

I have a bunch of pictures from this week to upload to my computer. We've been busy...the good kind of busy, and I have photos forthcoming to prove it! ;-)

These photos I found kicking around and I realized I hadn't posted them. They are from a month or so ago...a trip to the park to feed the ducks and sleep in trees!



The weather has all of a sudden turned rainy again- those bright days of sunshine from earlier this week are gone. It is pouring buckets!

I had to get out of the house today for a little bit. Mr. Mustard had a guy's night planned tonight (Laker's Game!), so I slipped out for an hour by myself this afternoon for some "me" time. I don't get to do that very often, so when the opportunity arises, I take it!

I decided to check out a different Salvation Army...the one down in Rancho Palos Verdes. I read on Yelp that it is a treasure-trove of designer and high-end cast-offs. So, I went down there. It was not good. The place was so huge I felt swallowed up by it, and everywhere I looked, I just saw stuff, stuff, stuff. Like some kind of hoarder's nightmare. It was packed with people (I think it had something to do with it being 30% off day), and after looking through the racks for a few minutes, I realized there were no gems there.

I have been decluttering a lot lately. Just getting rid of stuff. It's one of those things that comes pretty easily to me. After being in the Fire where I lost every material possession, I like to travel light when it comes to belongings. I realized back then that you can get caught up in the material stuff and it will take over your life. After the fire, I had nothing (well, nothing but my LIFE)...and it ended up being kind of freeing.

I am not saying that I want to go through that type of loss again. It was really horrifying on so many levels. But in the end, all of the stuff we have is just stuff. I was asked awhile ago what I would take out of my house in the event of a fire now, and besides making sure everyone got out safe, I told them that the one thing I would take would be Vivian and Annemarie's urns. The irony is not lost on me that the possession that I would save from a fire would be something that had already burned.

So, being at the Salvation Army today with throngs of bargain shoppers reminded me that every material possession I have is replaceable. Do I need to hang on to clothes that are too small? What is the replacement cost of those things? Judging from what I found at the Salvation Army, around $5 for a pair of pants.

Mr. Mustard likes to keep everything just in case. So, it's a balance in our house. And one that is probably for the best (you know, so we're not living in a house with 4 plates and 2 spoons). In the end, we both know what really matters. The best way to spend one's time is not shopping or fretting about the material stuff or even decluttering. Nope, the most precious times we have are with those we love. Doing stuff like pretending to sleep in trees. And not pretending very convincingly either! Ha!



Those are the memories that are the true treasures in life.

Hope your weekend is a good one! We'll be trying to stay dry here and getting ready for my dad and stepmom's visit next week. I am soooo excited!

Here Comes The Rain

The rains have come to Los Angeles. It's dark and it's very wet. When the skies open up with blue skies, they can quickly go back to rain in just a few moments. So, we are stuck inside. We've been reading books, playing dollhouse, and enjoying eachother's company. We are venturing outside as little as possible.



Our 2009 house hunt was filled with lots of drama. Besides the debacle with the house in Redondo Beach, which I'm not talking about because it gives me nightmares (really...and that's hard to do)...we also almost bought a house last year in La Crescenta/La Canada. You remember...the one that was on the edge of the biggest fire in LA County history?

Well, after the fires up in the mountains, the mudslides come. Here is a video of the street we almost bought a house on last year: Canyonside Drive. This video was taken on Monday.



Even though we did not buy this house, I feel connected to the people in it - the people who bought it and then were confronted with a terrible fire a few weeks later and mudslides now. They don't know me, but I just feel awful for them. And they are in my prayers.

Hiding Out From The Fire

The fire in La Canada-Flintridge is raging. The house we really wanted back in May...the one I have been kicking myself for not snatching up soon enough...it is in the middle of the burn zone and is likely destroyed by now. If not by now, then in the next few hours. That view from the backyard is gone. It has all burned. So sad. When we were viewing the house in May, the owner kept saying there wasn't a reason to worry about fires because, "this area hasn't burned in 50 years" - to which Mr. Mustard replied, "well, then it's probably overdue for a fire."

Mr. Mustard is really so much smarter than I give him credit for! I can't imagine having just bought this beautiful house, having to evacuate with a 10 week old baby and a three year old, and watching as our home and everything we own is destroyed by fire. I am really counting my blessings today.

I'm not saying that our house in Pasadena is safe. The fire keeps getting closer, and the air quality is horrible. But, if we'd bought that house at the top of Canyonside Rd., we would definitely be homeless now. Awful.

So, we've been hiding out inside to avoid the horrible air quality. Today, we spent the whole day inside with the air conditioning running and the air filter on high. I went out on our porch once to take this picture:



That big tower of smoke is from the fire burning up in the mountains. When I came back inside it felt like I had swallowed an ash tray's worth of ash and it hurt to breathe. It was so nasty that I knew we were going to be staying indoors. I didn't even want to take the girls out for a drive because they'd have to be outside to get into the car. The air quality is really awful.

So, instead we had fun indoors. Paprika soaked in the tub for a long time and "scrubbie scrubbied" all of her dolls and bath animals. Then she put all of her dolls to bed and read them bedtime stories like "Paddington Bear."



Paprika sang her dolls songs, of course. Then she would leave the room, come back in, wake everyone up, get them dressed and start all over again. It was pretty funny.



Ginger had a good time watching Paprika do all of this. She just laid on the bed and looked at her with her big brown eyes.



And then she'd look at me...



All in all, a good day...all things considered!

Fire On The Mountain

This was the view from our front porch yesterday. Turns out the fire I saw as we were going to McDonald's yesterday is turning out to be a big deal. Here is an article that was on my Yahoo News feed this morning.

That big cloud is smoke, and the red part down below is the glow from the fire. We're close to the fire, but not close enough to be threatened. It would have to burn through all of La Canada-Flintridge and into Pasadena to get to us. If that happens, we'll have lots of warning, and be able to get out with days to spare. Having lived through a house fire and escaped with seconds to spare...I would appreciate having a few days notice the next time a fire destroys my house. ;-)

I think about that house that we almost made an offer on back in May...the one perched right on the edge of the Angeles National Forest. I hope it's okay. The new owners closed on Ginger's birthday, June 18th. They just moved in, and now the Angeles National Forest (their backyard) is on fire. How is that for a house warming present? Bad joke, sorry. I do feel awful for them. I'd love to drive by the house and see if it's okay, but I'm pretty sure the roads are closed leading up to the house.

So, it's too smoky to go outside today again. I'm going to have to figure out more fun things to do with Paprika indoors. Play-doh, drawing, reading...and when all else fails, Princess dvds!

10 Weeks!

Ginger is 10 weeks old today! She celebrated by staying awake until 4am last night. She woke up at 8:30am to eat, and then went back to sleep. That would be great except that Paprika woke me up right at 9am this morning, so I slept from 4am til 8:30am...and that's it. 4.5 hours of sleep. Grrrrr. That seems to be the norm this week. One good thing about Paprika being at preschool is that when I have those late nights with Ginger (which is most nights), at least I can get some sleep before I pick Paprika up from preschool.

I just have today and tomorrow...then Mr. Mustard will be home this weekend...then preschool starts on Monday.

There is a big fire in the hills of Los Angeles, and it's been going on for a few days now. The air quality is so bad that we can't go outside today. The air is full of ash and so smoky. Paprika is already bouncing off the walls. Should be an interesting day! ;-)

The Fire

Sometimes when I look back at my life so far, I am struck by how extraordinary it has been. Life has not been boring, that's for sure! Even though my goal has been to live a quiet, simple life- I find that often times, things happen in my life that just don't really happen to too many other people!

Case in point: right after college, I moved from Indiana to San Francisco and took a job as a graphic designer for The Gap. I moved into a house with six other roommates- the same house where The Real World: San Francisco was once filmed. I got settled, I was a single girl with my first "real job"- life was good. I was 21 years old, and life was so open to possibilities. Then eight months later, on June 8, 2000, at 3:20am, everything changed.

Kitchen Post-Fire:



Side-View of Kitchen:



More Kitchen:



I was asleep when a fire, set off by a burning candle in the bedroom next to mine, raged through the house. In a matter of minutes, everything was gone. By the time I woke up, the entire house was engulfed in flames. The walls were on fire, the curtains were on fire, my shoes were on fire! The windows had shattered from the heat, and smoke was so thick you could not see two inches in front of your face. I had about 15 seconds to get out of the house (my bedroom was on the second floor) before I would have passed out from smoke inhalation and been burned alive.

Miraculously, everyone in the house made it out alive. I have learned that in fires like this, people often do not make it out alive. So easily, I could have lost my life that night. 15 seconds. That's it.


One of Many Firetrucks At The Scene:



Personal possessions thrown out my bedroom window by firefighters:



The fire was intense- it took every material possession I had ever owned in a matter of minutes. My parents' wedding rings were gone. The journals I had written over my entire life were gone. Photographs of my most precious memories, also gone. And of course, every scrap of clothing, every book, my computer, even my toothbrush - gone.

It was also quick, fast, unexpected, and violent. Being trapped inside that house was terrifying and left me emotionally shocked for years afterwards.

Years.

I would wake up in the middle of the night with dreams of my internal organs burning me alive from the inside out. I could not be around even a candle. I could not eat food that had been cooked...burned, in my mind. To this day, I still wake up in the middle of the night to make sure the stove has been turned off. I am reminded of lasting traces of the fire all the time. It was a defining moment for me.

The fire also gave me gifts. It gave me an appreciation for life, and also made me realize that the things we have in our lives- "the stuff"- is all just stuff.

The Stairwell:



Bathroom:



Some people think my life was spared because God wasn't through with me yet, or my life had a special purpose not yet realized. I am not arrogant enough to go there. I have seen too many good people die- parents gripped by cancer who leave small children behind, teenagers killed in senseless car accidents- to think that God spared me somehow.

But, for whatever reason- whatever twist of fate- I was spared...and it was a miracle...and for that, I am grateful and have consistently tried to make my life worthy of a great purpose since the day I was given this second chance at life.

Closet Next To My Bedroom:



So, why am I bringing all this up now?

A few days ago, I got a Facebook friend request and email from one of my roommates in the fire. I hadn't talked to her in almost nine years, since the fire happened. She just did a commercial for Mutual of Omaha about the fire, and she talked about how it transformed her life. Her story and link to her video is here: http://ahamoment.com/pg/moments/view/117

It was so interesting reconnecting with her after all these years. After chatting with her over email, I went through the pictures I took of the aftermath of the fire. In a moment, I was transported back to that day. I haven't looked at those pictures in over eight years, since I picked them up from the photo lab (that was back in the day...you know, when we used actual film in our cameras).

My Bedroom:



The View Out My Bedroom Window The Day After The Fire:



The fire was covered in USA Today and in the San Francisco Chronicle, because the house we lived in was famous, and the fire was so big and destructive. I remember it being surreal reading about something so monumental in my life in these newspapers. For so many people, they read that story, and then tossed their paper aside, went on with their day, and promptly forgot about it. For me, of course, I live with that story every day.

It was a defining moment in my life. The defining moment? No. Somehow I have had enough of these defining moments throughout my life to fill volumes! For example, in just the few weeks after the fire: An electrical transformer exploded on top of me while I was walking down the street, a 2x4 board flew through my car's front windowshield while I was driving cross-country (missing my head by two inches), and I got sick with Scarlet Fever. And that was just in the three weeks following the fire! All that, as unbelievable as it sounds, is true...and is a story for another day!